The Beach.

It was Abhi’s birthday on the 11th and if I haven’t mentioned this before – I’m very poor with numbers and dates alike. I somehow seem to prefer text more to numbers. I must say that I’ve been fascinated by numbers recently because I’m watching the series – Numb3rs. Its funny that when I’m writing, I’d prefer writing it as twenty instead of 20. It seems to glorify my affinity towards letters and words of the English language and takes me further away from numbers. Well, thats precisely why I was very bad at Math. I was good at algebra though because it had letters in it, you know? Formulae and others. I found it easy to comprehend and understand.

I suddenly noticed that I’ve strayed away from the point and so I’d just quickly trackback to where I was; Abhi’s birthday. He turned 27 and we celebrated his birthday and his coming to Bangalore (for 2 days) in complete style yesterday at this place called “The Beach” This was an awesome experience for me, Ajay and Ritesh (Ajay’s friend from mumbai) Abhi sucked on his obvious distaste for loud music that he could not comprehend much. He stared at the table and wondered, “Whats wrong with these people!?” Ajay sang well. In fact, I’d say he did an outstanding job of entertaining all those who were present. There was this other guy, I’m not sure about his name, so lets call him Sam. So Sam was the other singer who sang very well and that too without losing an ounce of energry. Mostly because of all the smoke he was puffing in and out along with whatever it was that he was drinking. Then there was this gay guy who sang very much like Enrique and the chicks dug his style of singing. Ohhh, and we actually had a gay guy there who wore denims meant for the girls and those flat osho type slippers that they wear. The girls seemed to be very comfortable around him and they danced along, sometimes weird and the other times funny. Then there was this guy who had come along with a girl who seemed disturbed that she was there with him and was trying to avoid any kind of talks. She stared at all the others around and tried to avoid talking to him. This guy was stupid anyway, he sat on the seat after he had pushed the cushion down, jackass. He tried to dance with a chick who thought she could dance, but then Ajay and me though that they sucked at it. There was this one girl that I liked, but then she was a bloody chimney. I guess they were this gang of friends and friends of friends who knew each other. It was a gang of around 25 odd people and they were all fired up. Funny that Ajay still stole the show with songs like – Angel, Alice and Smells like Teen spirit. I actually loved it when he sang Smells like teen spirit cause I was jumping around and yelling along from behind. The next time, I’ll be up front and I’ll make sure that I croak. YAY for Karaoke.

Abhi, Ajay and me!

We got over the food part pretty quickly cause we had delicious french fries and some amazing paneer starters. No one wanted anything to eat after it. They drank some beer, smoked a lot of cigs and the shop closed its gates at 11. Its pretty strict here in Bangalore and somehow, I feel its a good practise. Lesser deaths due to accidents caused off negligent/under the influence of alcohol driving. Most dancers and clubbers hate it though and they’re hoping that the new government would probably take out the various limits and bans they’ve set. Well, lets see where that goes.

We clicked a few pictures after reaching home and from there Ajay and the guys came over to my place to drop me. Here was where we picked Abhi up and kicked him like madmen at 12:00 AM in the morning. Adventurous, I’d say; picking Abhi up was arduous and then we had to kick him simultaneously. I guess his ass musn’t have hurt cause its huge and all full of chubby ASS! Well, that ended the whole Karaoke thing and I must say, I enjoyed it. Thanks Ajay.Me and Ajay.

Something I missed to type in from last week. I watched the movie Sarkar Raj and I’d say its a must watch. Not for RGV, he sucks more after his AAG! But then, you wouldn’t want to miss the chemistry of the father-son duo in the movie. They rocked. Aishwarya looked old, weird and unfit for the clothes she wore, I thought. Plus, she’s tall in an unattractive way, unlike Shilpa Shetty or Deepika Padukone; well they look delicious! The movie is awesome and I loved the sound track. I must sleep now, haven’t slept in two days and I am about to crash on the keyboard.


The petrol bunk drama; amongst others!

Before I go on to describe the ordeal that I had to go through at a petrol bunk here in Bangalore, I’d like to talk about how much of an imbecilic fool I’ve been and how my extravagant nature is finally getting onto my nerves. I was trying to book tickets online for the new mallu movie showing in PVR and my card got declined. Yes, you got that right – my credit card. CREDIT is the golden word here. I love credit cards, did I ever mention that? Well, how I love swiping those beauties into machines and churning out paper bills that don’t look cute. I stare at them and think, “WOW, I own this piece of shit!” I’m supposed to pay this baby off; my gold card from Citibank that is. Because if I don’t I’m sure it’ll rape me with all its might. Interest and interest ON interest. Overall, it’d become a charade of taxes and fees that’d ruin your INCOME. Well, who was to care? I’m a shopaholic and I’m not proud about the way I am. Uhm, I was never proud of the way I was and am, so to say. Why this sudden revelation? My card got declined and I go like, “What the fuck? I’ve got a crazy limit on this card!!” I call up Citibank and they talk to me about my dues. Man, I’m ruined. I won’t talk about how much I need to pay up, but please know that its a HUGE SUM OF CREDIT. And I’m pretty much ruined, sigh.

My recent additions to the things I own:
A new Timex Mariner (totally worth the buy):

Timex Mariner

Suck on this:

Suck on it, losers.

Levis; expensive shit:


I realized that I did not have any money after I bought all of this on my debit card. Simply put, I’m a bit more than broke for this month and a few more months to come. Another one of my theories went down the drains though. There’s this disease that I suffer from. I make up stories and think up things which are so wrong and baseless that in the end, I feel like asking myself to go fuck myself. Hrmphhh, does that make any sense? Arghhh, forget about it. The theory that you’d spend more if you have a girl friend is NOT TRUE. If any of you’ll had similar thoughts, well; not true. Infact, you’d spend more after a break up and then spend some more when you feel lonely; to fill the void and crap like that, you know? Anyhoo, I’m done with my crap. No more shitty expenditures for 6 months at least, kapiche?

Coming to the episode of the Petrol bunk. Now, most of you’ll must have seen me, right? If not, there’s a picture of me in the “About” section. Please look it up. So, from my picture, do I look like an idiot? From certain angles, yes, but look at the angle which makes me look smart and aware! From that angle, I don’t quiet look like a guy who’d be fooled all that easily, right? Well, here’s the deal – I want to fill petrol for Rs 500, thats my aim. I stop at this dirty little petrol bunk cause its the only one that falls on my way to work. There is Shell other than this, but thats way too expensive for my tastes anyway. So I stopped here and I know their tricks so, I showed him a Rs 500 ka note, gave him the note and asked him to fill petrol. First mistake: The bugger stops at 100. Why? Well, you asked me to fill up 100, didn’t you? And I look at him, all angry and red! I don’t say much, but I give him the meanest most dirtiest look ever. He, kinda startled by my rage, “Ohh, 500 aaaaaa??” with that typical “aaaa” attached in the end. I shut up and continue looking at the meter. Here he stops at 400. I look at him again, this time ready to thrash the shit out of him. I asked him why he stopped? He said, well, I began from 0 after filling upto 100. Then I began a saga of crap talk which lasted a full 10 minutes of a Kindi(hindi+Kannada) scuffle between me and him. In the end, the manager comes running. I tell him about what happened and that I’ve read enough off the internet, if he doesn’t go onto fill Rs 100 worth more of petrol, I’m calling the cops. He sulks, makes a face and mumbles something in Kannada, which might have meant; fill her up! He walks with a scoff and continues to count his notes. I look on as he touches 100. He throws a tantrum and picks up a few words in Kannada which I wouldn’t have understood. Throws it all around me and walks off. I ignore his poverty of sense and begin getting into my car. Thats when this guy (who took the money from me to begin with) he comes running and asks, “Saaaar, paisa?” and I give him the, “Dude!! What the fuck is wrong with you guys?!” kinda look and begin getting down from my car, this time really to thrash him up! I would have gotten thrashed if I had done that, but then things kinda rocketed out of my boundaries of tolerance. The bastard tried to trick me with this one? Who do I look like? You? Bastard. So I walk upto him and tell him that I gave him the money before filling the petrol. He looks at my very red face, searches his purse and comes up up with a Rs 500 note that wasn’t mine, cause I had given him a new one and this was a torn one. He nods his head in agreement to the fact that I did actually give the money and walks off with a kiddish giggle. I curse the gods and drive off. I mean, how would you try to con me with that one saaar? Anyway, that ends the saga. I’m happy its over and hence on, I’ll fill oil only at Shell. Fuck you, assholes!


The ‘move on’ generation.

I’d like to begin with this:

This seems like an advertisement that’d make people giggle or to the least bring a smile on anyone’s face. Its not because the advertisement has a deep meaning but its more in awe for the director of the advertisement and the person who must have designed the whole concept. A break-up has been portrayed without any fuss and with a lot of ease. Now, isn’t this what all of us want? All of us who would want a friend, someone more than a friend, a friend to kiss, a friend to hug and a fuck friend? Something more than that? Nada, move on…

Different people take different routes out of break ups. While most of them might just gather their balls and bags and like fastrack said, move on. Others might choose to ignore the obvious pain that they feel inside of them and live with a smile on their face which is so fake that it’d make even the dog trotting on the road to scoff in pity. A few others would live in bliss and ignore the whole episode as a bad nightmare. They wouldn’t feel anything and yes, they’d relive and be reborn like a raven out of its own ashes. Very few would actually dig into what happened and what went wrong. Why did I lose out on love? Why did I make wrong decisions? What were the wrong decisions? Why did I do these things like this and not like that? A lot of questions need to be answered so that you don’t make the same mistakes again, but then who cares and who bothers ehh? You see the next body you like, you get attracted and the saga begins. Also, I forgot to mention about a very minor sect of people who’d begin a new route whilst they are on one track. Now, these are the kinds who’d betray you for peanuts! These are the kinds who need to shove love right down their own asses and go get what they want – shit on their face.

I’ve seen love failing over and over now, over the past 3 odd years. I have my own story to tell too, amongst all of the broken hearts, I have my own heart too. Not that it matters much, but I’ve learnt a lot and I’m proud that I took time off to think it out of me. I’m happy that I had friends who helped me out. I’m very happy that I did NOT move on… as if the love I had in my heart, as if the person did not exist, the love my heartbeat for; all through the time I was with her. I’m happy that I was human enough to thank god for what I experienced and I cherished every moment of it before I let it go. Actually, I did not let it go, time took it away from me. What annoys me though are ads like these which portray love to be nothing less than a drama done by college kids! We ourselves are vandalizing the next generation of kids who wouldn’t know what it means to be in love. Pfft, god damn media advertisers.


Thats what you mean to me Ted!

I’m coming Ted! His best friend needed him. He’s awesome.

A revolutionary.

Am I dead? Ha? Am I dead? What would the world be without him?

The awesomes

Now thats what I call – BRO LOVE!


The rains here!

Rain always puts me in a stupendously good mood. However bad the environmental variables be. The end result is a smile on my face. I mean, imagine me being stuck in traffic for over 2 hours. Ohh yes, thats right, I had my first 2 hour jam after coming to Bangalore. That’d probably be nothing new for most others who have travelled during peak hours here, but for me, this was the first time. Somehow, it didn’t bother me. I couldn’t help keeping the window of my car open and watch the rain. It used to pour heavily sometimes and get my sides all wet, but I just couldn’t pull up the glasses. The fragrance of wet mud is amazing, isn’t it? Ohh and the sound of rain beating against the roads, the cars, people and other objects, it sounded like music to my ears! Overall, as usual, rain put me in a mixed emotional spot. A spot that had nostalgia, pain, joy and most of all hope.

I couldn’t stop myself from thinking up:

Speak to me in a tongue,
Only few understand,
Oh heart of hearts;
Oh soul of souls.

It matters little,
That no one knows,
Oh heart of hearts;
Oh soul of souls.

And we tread barefoot, you and I,
Our soles wet with dew,
Cast from a dream, a pleasant lie.

And I will dream again and die,
To live another dream with you,
Until the next we meet,
In my heart of hearts;
My soul of souls.

Well, I ended up missing all my friends. I missed all the people I loved and had left behind. I felt guilty and sorry for all the bad that I did and I felt like apologizing to people for the bad that I did to them. I haven’t thanked God enough for keeping me alive as of yet and I must visit the temple. Its not necassary to do it cause I call myself an Agnostic. Hrmphhhh, I’m not. I’m a believer. I sent out an email to Johnson and Priyanka and managed to find the courage I needed to apologize for what I did. I’m not sure if they’d be able to forgive me for what I did, but I did do my part. Once again, I’m sorry you guys. I did not want it to be this way and I’ll miss you. I’m going through another rough patch.

Mom and Sneha are off to Kerala today. I’m going to miss them. I still have to get the songs Sneha wanted and then burn it for her. I’ll do it as soon as I go home today. I have to drop them to the railway station tonight and I don’t even know where the place is. I’ll hire a taxi or something. I may not come to office today; might as well stay at home and get some rest. I need it cause of the terrible headache that I’ve been carrying with me since quite some time now. Monday is the day – I will visit the doctor. I’m shameless mostly; even a public word is breakable, as per me. I’m still the best. Bangalore is awesome and I love the rains. Ohhh and traffic, you can never win over me. I’ll win over you each and every time. I’ll fuckin’ drive over you. Beat that! Peace out \m/


Happy till the next deterioration.

Huh!? What? Alright, here’s the thing; I hate this, but I’m living a life full of addictions. I like a thing and then I get stuck to it. I get stuck to it till the time I get bored of it or it gets bored of me. This is irrespective of things, people and the internet. These days, I’m addicted to something I had left long back. I used to loathe it then, but here I am again; ORKUT! Goddamn you.  Well, fuck this. I’m not too sure about how long I’d stick to orkut anyway. One fine day, I’m sure I’d find a reason to hate it, a ruse which would drive me away from it. Till that time, happy hunting for people I know!melt

I’m ok with getting stuck to music though. I’m not sure why, but I always end up getting stuck to numbers I like. The new album from POTF is nice. I like it and its playing; at home and at office, continously and it doesn’t bore me to go through the music over and over again. That being said, my classes have begun – CCNA at Mohans Networking institute. I must say, I’m fascinated by what I’ve heard so far and I’m looking forward to some more interesting sessions. Lectures that will include topics like Subnetting, switching, routing, protocols used for communication, IPv6 and a few others. I’m hoping for good discussions on these topics because I’m sure that I’d need all this later on. I payed 6 grands to start off with and guess I can pay off the rest by next month. Thats good, else I’d have been broke this month. I earn enough, I know, but somehow, my budget was shaky this month.

Office isn’t too busy these days. I have my usual set of things that I do, apart from that nothing that excites me a lot. Especially since I’m covering nights. I feel ok with night shifts somehow. Dad did not seem to like it much. I’m hoping for this month to pass of quick and for May to come in really really quick. I can’t wait for hitting the roads and driving over to Goa. Meeting Abhi, Muiz and Sanket. It’d be fun!

I feel good almost always these days and I guess I’ve escaped from the charade of liars that plagued my life. No, I don’t hate them, but I’m happy to be far away, never to see all of them again. They seem to still visit me via nightmares, but I manage to set them all aside when I’m living my life these days. Somehow, my experiences seem to have made me stronger. Like Lijo said, I don’t hate you for breaking my heart. I’m thankful to you for teaching me how to live with it. Its made me stronger and I’ll live well – no doubts. Uhm, so thats the deal – I’m happy now, but I’m sure that out of plain ignorance I’ll jump into something that’s going to cause me trouble anyway. I can’t seem to help myself. My affinity towards pain and suffering is worth the giggle! So… guess I can be Happy till the next deterioration.