I’ve always been in love with the smaller things in life. I’d take my time to savour every second of such an occasion and my brains full of these tiny but important things. Come to think of it now, I don’t like thinking of the more complicated problems I or anyone else has for that matter. I’m better off in my world of bits and tinier bits.
I was talking to Ruch yesterday and it was from there that I had this whole thought of expressing whatever was in my heart. Again, I’ve not yet learnt the basic instinct where we humans think and act from different parts of our body. For me, its all heart and I’d want to change but I can’t seem to help myself now. Ruch was telling me about her small squabbles at home and how it affects her. The weird feeling in me was about how drabby life would be without these small fights at home. No reason to cry, no reason to apologize, fights with mom and siblings, a sibling who adores you, a father who acts tough but isn’t and most importantly the food mom cooks! Foods the reason for all make-ups at my place. We’d all have to face each other at the table, whatever the fight be!
I sometimes feel like I’m watching the world around me from a distance and I look at all those people running around for glitz, glamour and glory. I’m confused, do I really want to be a part of the mob or am I happy where I am; this distant space in time where its just me and I’m looking at the world? I’m not a part of the race. I don’t feel the need to excel in anything. I don’t feel like competing cause I always find myself running on a different plateau and I’m tired of running. Why should I bother competing with myself? I can see everyone else running a race they’d never finish. Trying desperately to outrun everyone else. And in this feeble attempt at winning life’s race they’d forget to wait and notice whats whizzing by. Its beauty unlike what they’ve ever seen. I am contented with what I have and with the way I live life but I feel the need to share the infinite joys I find in smaller things and I find no one to share it with cause everyone else is running. I know, I might sound depressing. But then, think about it how many of us have the time to:
- Wake up in the morning and look at the rising sun and feel its warmth.
- Talk to the watchman and share a smile.
- Take out your own garbage.
- Let that stray dog walk with you silently.
- Take a walk and observe people.
- Think about aliens and wonder about life on other planets.(HELL YEAH!!)
- Dig your nose on an idle tuesday afternoon. At work? Then notice the people around and pretend that you have an irritable itch.
I can think of many more small reasons to feel happy for life but then I feel the world around me has turned anhedonic and what makes them happy is success, power, money and everything else thats nothing but temporary. I guess people would laugh at me for being a dorky dreamer or a whacko freak but then I’ve learnt to not give a shit and then again – Ignorance is bliss! I feel sad for myself cause I’m part of the mob and I sometimes tend to flow in its flow. Here again, I remember the time when I was in love. Man!! I so miss those seconds… those seconds when I watched her walk back home and I waited for her to fade off, waited for her to whisper a ‘love you’ as she clenched onto my jelly belly and we drove off to nowhere, watched her eyes close ever so slowly as we kissed; seemed like eons of neverending glee… THEN! Now, I don’t quite know what to make of all of that. I’m just part of the move on generation and all I can do is move on ever so nonchalant, lost for words and love.
8 thoughts on “The smaller things in life.”
I agree.. I have been told by many that I dont compete.. but who cares man?
Sab latak rahe hain.. 😀
“I’m confused, do I really want to be a part of the mob or am I happy where I am; this distant space in time where its just me and I’m looking at the world? I’m not a part of the race. I don’t feel the need to excel in anything.”
You know great people say.. you have found peace when you are contend!!
You bloody great man 😀
Feeling and longing are the motive forces behind all human endeavor and human creations.
I think we have stopped feeling the smaller things in life and live only longing for more.
When you run so fast to get somewhere
You miss half the fun of getting there.
When you worry and hurry through your day,
It is like an unopened gift…
Loved your post !!
Thanks for your comments you guys.
“Man!! I so miss those seconds…”
**We (the mob) all do. But given a chance, we will not be able to re-live those moments as we did then, coz we have moved ahead, our minds have grown past them all. *bittersweet irony*
At 12, you no longer enjoy the colorful abacus play as you did at 6. You may appreciate it, but the thrill fades.
a point to note….
“You may be part of the mob to the world, as they see it… and you may not notice others savoring smaller/simpler things in life…. but they do”
that said, half this world is part of an endless rat race…..
and we all participate at some point, unaware at times….
and we call that life… BULL 😛
with some disciplined structure you could sell what you write…think about it.
I’m working towards it. Thanks Roy.